McRib

McDonald's has recently brought back the McRib; an apparently pork based product of congealed "meat", no less no doubt also including mulched hair, hooves, and hide.

And as I saw the television advertisement, I couldn't help but be reminded of the Simpsons episode (and I don't know which one) where Homer joins a Ribwich travelling freak show of dedicated Krusty Burger fans following the cross country staggering limited release of this fine porcine sandwich delight.

And it was this memory which caused me to subconsciously, nay unwillingly, divert myself to the nearest McDonald's haven of harbingers of heart clogging, fat building, diabetic coma inducing "food".

Now, I'm no sucker for gimmicks; I never order a drink (other than tap water), and I never order those nasty once-a-potato american fries. I order my McRib, without onions (who knows where Quique's hands were before picking that onion from a sweat-field in Mexico), and decide that it's not going to be enough to satiate the hunger within, I also order two double cheeze-burgers from the value menu, without onions.

Of course that goo resembling meat tasted great. I was hungry. As I chewed and swallowed my way to an earlier grave, I was transmogrified back to a time and place somewhere in my childhood when my imaginary friend would eat at McDonald's with me.

And I would like to end on a happy note right here. But I cannot.

Along with the McRib came the McGas and now the McPoo.


AVOID THE McRib!